High School Sports Under the Bleachers
By Mike Marino
High School Cheerleaders! They fuel inject the team spirit and fan loyalty to the pro game, and add a pot full of carnal passion to the promiscuous delight of the Friday Night Lights high school crowd. Sure there are also baton twirlers in short baton twirling skirts and Radio City Rockettes thigh high Gestapo goose stepping leg kicks who love to show off how they can manhandle a very big shaft making it spin, twirl and ob ... ey on command as it returns and nests softly in the warm hands of a pubescent blonde Lolita.

The crowds of students, parents and homeroom teachers jockey for the best bleacher seats….the potbellied parental fan of the game opts for the sky high seats to armchair quarterback every play in the coach’s playbook. Unless of course his kid is on the team. Then he becomes the loud, boisterous, overzealous embarrassment of his offspring for all four quarters.

Students with more of an interest dictated by hormonal changes choose the first lowest row. When the home team scores a goal...he and she in many cases, (lesbians are people too you know!) can get a glimpse of animated cheerleader cartwheel action that will expose, if lucky, the Pearly Gates and the promise of hidden treasure more exciting than a ton of gold on a Spanish galleon heading home laden with wealth stolen from the Phillipines. This is Cheerleader Booty. The stuff Dallas Cheerleader dreams are made off...in the world of sports, this is the gridiron cheerleader Maltese Falcon moment of sexuality. floor length homecoming dresses

The girls in the high school marching band are usually not man magnets, nor are male bandies chick magnets. The uniforms are stuffy....long pants and funny hats that make them look like refugees from Sgt Peppers band while wearing heavy coats that hide breast size which by the way would be too heavy to wear for even a Russian soldier on the frontier of Ukraine in winter.

No one, to my limited knowledge of school ever wanted to fuck a bandy. Dress them up in short plaid skirts and push up training bras for the girls and maybe kilts with daygo jockstraps for the guys and you may have something going for the coy co-ed audience. Let’s make bandy’s sexy again. Forget the librarian look….think Sharon Stone with a tuba!!

I do think those in the brass and woodwind section would make for better sex partners as they can do wonders with a large instrument begging to be played. Bring more sexuality to the gridiron. Peek-a-boo short skirt pigskin moments during halftime cheerleader mating rituals. Abandon band prim and proper propriety and bring on the topless piccolo players. Baton twirlers can twirl but imagine what they could do as pole dancers!

If pigskin action and John Phillip Sousa music is not your cup of tea….then you can always be cool...and try to fuck the prom queen under the bleachers. Go Team Go!